Week of June 16, 2011

Spread your poetry far and wide, rams, from the localest home base to the outermost regions of the galaxies. The community- both at home and abroad- need those groovy transmissions now more than ever. The funny thing is-I can't tell if its you or them that gets more out of such fearless revelation of your innermost inspirations.

Aries of the Week: Mars Odyssey

Speak up, bulls, on the behalf of your beloved ones. Do what you think is "right", regardless of how popular you end up being (or not). Be more than willing to sacrifice comfort for change. I don't mean dollars and cents, by the way. Im talking about a revolution of sorts, ya know?

Taurus of the Week: Hans Albert Einstein

Pretend you're a high class detective, hired to solve the curious case of the missing truth. At the very least, it'll cause you to remember just what an extra smart, sly, and slick spy you are. Not only are you a natural at unraveling dense and tricky "reality", it also brings you great joy.

Gemini of the Week: Houston, TX

There's a cheer we used in the eighth grade to motivate the flag football players. It went a little something like this: "You got to be aggressive, got to be aggressive, got to B-E-A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E. !!" Let's dedicate that rhyme to your personal cause this week, crabs, as you attempt to move forward and break from those ties that annoyingly b(l)ind you.

Cancer of the Week: Vittorio D'Sica

This week you'll have the rare chance to be the rookie, cats. The upsides to being a beginner are that you aren't expected to be an expert, you don't bear the burden of total responsibility, and there is thus plenty of room to grow. I thought I should mention the benefits so that you didn't hesitate as much about accepting the unique opportunity.

Leo of the Week: Treaty of Peace and friendship between Japan and the Peoples Republic of China

As the messenger, I must inform you, virg, that at this point trying to convince anyone of your perspective is just a pure waste of valuable time. For all those moments spent explaining, you could be living such truths out loud. Your actions will speak louder and clearer than your words right now, so skip the small talk.

Virgo of the Week: Geike Annaert

To manifest your grandest vision this summer season, you are given special clearance past all the road blocks. Thank you universe. Now meet the cosmos halfway and sacrifice the need for applause, praise, or mutual support. Trust that you will still have all you need to construct your vision. Align yourself with the stealthy, rhythmic powers of the diviner plan.

Libra of the Week: "The Colbert Plan"

Everyone has seen or at least heard about the fatal side of the deadly scorpion. Thats a well exploited secret. But what few earth inhabitants are privy to are the strangely merciful, immaculately omniscent, totally graceful sides that reveal you as ever loving, yet firm, supportive but exacting. This week you'll get the chance to tap back into your full/actual powers.

Scorpio of the Week: The Times of India

Nature is calling you, archers and it'd be in your best interest to answer her. Even better would be to let her pin you down and have her way with you, delaying whatever plans you might have in exchange for a strong dose of gentle affection, simple friendship, and perhaps a nice long massage...

Sagittarius of the Week: Twista

It's best if, as you strive to complete an important mission, you are neither too sensitive or overly visible. Be cool, calm, and camoflauged, goats. Travel by night, avoiding extra traffic, attention, or chaos, to ensure that you reach your final destination in the smoothest manner possible.

Capricorn of the Week: Marianne Faithful

To undo any unwanted joo-joo, or reverse the effects of past karma, give freely of thyself water bearer. Let your charged charm flow copiously from you, without restraint. Be less of a miser, and more of a midas, hording not so much as turning all that you touch into shimmering gold.

Aquarius of the Week: Patrick Wilson

To move beyond the truth, it's probably a wise idea to first completely face it, absorbing the facts enough that by the time it comes to leave them behind, you'll not only be ready, having come entirely to terms with the information, but you'll also be more concise and unwaveringly certain of your decision making, after examining the details.

Pisces of the Week: Ira Glass