HOROSCOPES

Week of September 17, 2010

ARIES
You've recently learned how to do things differently than the way you are used to. According to the omens, n-o-w is an excellent time to begin practicing new tricks n trades. Start by making extrA efforts to constantly honor what you see/ know so crystal clear-ly.

Aries of the Week: Ellen Barkin

TAURUS
Whether metaphorically or literally, bulls, it seems like you're leaving your small town for the big city. I've consulted with your guides to gather more information about your "trip" and it seems all you'll need to pack along with you for the journey is your Best Self. Everything else is pretty much irrelevant in comparison to the usefulness of your own personal mojo.

Taurus of the Week: James L. Brooks

GEMINI
In the midst of gossip, slander, lies and illusion, you'll have to remain true, bold, and also crafty. Doubt not your ability to be as persevering as you are forthright as you are cleverly adept at revealing the purer aspect of things, *TWINS*.

Gemini of the Week: Joao Gilberto

CANCER
Like all cats, you've had at least nine lives. Actually according to our records, its more like nine billion or trillion. Tell us about those, crabs. What went down exactly? Amuse, enlighten, and educate us with the details of your specific adventures, won't you please?

Cancer of the Week: Vermont is the first US territory to abolish slavery

LEO
Find a home for your grand-est dreams Lions. Instead of trying to scale them down, I mean, just keep searching for the "place", i.e. the one that can easily house the breadth of your ideas and aspirations. Seek the space that is wide and steady enough to permit your loudest/ wildest/tallest visions.

Leo of the Week: Jackee Harry

VIRGO
Lay low, virg, while keeping your eye fastened on the BALL. Scrutinize the scene without saying much, using all the time to observe. Hold your fire, so that when it comes time to unveil your knowledge, mystery may pronounce itself on your own non-violent terms.

Virgo of the Week: Tyler Perry

LIBRA
It isn't too late to try and live up to your heart's expectations. Head out then on the unmarked path of your lovingest inclinations. Let your hair blow free in the winds as you go, unconcerned with anything but the beauty of your motion. As you travel, you will naturally re-learn about where you do/ don't want to go.

Libra of the Week: Ziggy Marley

SCORPIO
Be a wizard, while standing still, scorp. Maintain your poetic poise, while revealing the total electricity you are experiencing. Let your feet be planted as firmly as possible while the upper part of you sways to and fro in the untamed breeze, demonstrating ceaseless dance from a fixed and thereby ultimately more powerful position.

Scorpio of the Week: Calista Flockhart

SAGITARIUS
Get a foot rub, archers. Massage those appendages, which have been seemingly walking for miles on end. A little bit of rest improves your game a LOT. Hang your tools up and recline, SAG. Sit the next round out so that when you re-enter the arena, you can more easily stay in it.

Sagitarius of the Week: Sara Silverman

CAPRICORN
As long as you swallow the lesson whole, you won't have to learn it again. Digest the contents fully, particularly the parts concerning your dignity and self worth, trusting that once you do, the excruciating part of the trial can be over and the ecstasy of the benefits can soon be felt.

Capricorn of the Week: Mary Higgins Clark

AQUARIUS
My mother, soon to be grandma, insists that its important to live your life without the need for accolades from others. This statement makes sense, coming from a woman as naturally rebellious and as instinctively bad-ass as she. Take her advice to heart, water bearers. Believe her when she tells you it isn't as necessary as you think to gather applause, as long as you're having a ton of fun.

Aquarius of the Week: Jeru the Damagah

PISCES
If you find yourself doubting what you're capable of this week, fish, take a good look at what you've already achieved. Make a list and refer to it throughout the day, as solid proof of what you can pull off, just as soon as you totally decide you are going to.

Pisces of the Week: Wilhelm Grimm