Week of April 10, 2008

What are you thirsty for, warriors? Whatever it is, just remain patient. My astral radar predicts you will soon be replenished. Keep the faith. Romantic, financial, and spiritual relief is on its merry way.

Aries of the Week: Amy Ray

Last week the stars advised that you let your healing energy flow freely from you once your "allies" arrived. This week the message is similar. Only instead of openly giving to your own, you'll be making the offering to those you least expected-your enemies, opponents, etc. This widening of the heart will add strength to your dreams and fascinations...

Taurus of the Week: the Kentucky derby

Hermeticism, a cult dating from 830 CE, is a set of philosophical and religious beliefs underlying most practice in western magic. It's teachings are based on the writings of Hermes, an Egyptian sage and priest, whose last name, Trimegistus, meaning, "Thrice great" is a symbol of the three parts of the wisdom of the entire universe. This includes the following areas of interest: alchemy, : the proccess by which a material body is brought to perfection by way of both understanding and applying nature's mysteries. astrology: the knowledge of influence and the subsequent action taken, and finally, theurgy: an attainment of divine consciousness reliant upon the alliance one makes with higher counterparts, such as angels and gods. Take note.

Gemini of the Week: GEMINI 4- the first multi-day space flight

In the mood for love? Then try this: shower yourself with it, wrap your arms around you, etc. This will avoid any confusion. While you bathe yourself in the golden light, others will be overcome with your amorous odor, attracting to you an abundance of affection.

Cancer of the Week: Wyoming

To reclaim your heart's greatest wish, you need only take full ownership of your feelings. In the face of perilous roads and tricksters in disguise, grow even bolder and more brazen. This gives you the focus needed to keep driving/playing. As long as you retain such freedom, most especially from your pride, your dreams are always within reach.

Leo of the Week: Richie Ramone

Let someone else be the boss for a change. Then you can relax, spread your wings a little, experience the simple sensual pleasures which you are long deserving of. To prepare: start taking space from your "projects." Make gradual steps all week towards a full blown VACATION.

Virgo of the Week: California

I've been feeling extra guilty this week for my severe truth telling. Luckily, I have you for a role model: the ever vocal scales, the constantly communicating revolutionary, perpetually inciting change and provoking growth. Keep up the rebellion while maintaining your integrity. A set of sturdy wings with which to fly will soonly be provided.

Libra of the Week: PBS

It's opposite week. Try out new: approaches, routines, habits and reactions. This is arousing enough to bring you fully out of your skin, which is beneficial to all the projects you are currently trying to lift off the ground. Offer yourself to the slaughter. It's the "safest" place to go...

Scorpio of the Week: "Long Day's Journey into Night"

"What's original sin?", my roomate asked me. Thanks to sixteen years of catholic school training, I knew the answer. However, my first instinct was to offer an alternative explanation-"nothing, a made up fictitious myth used to scare people from exercising their free will." I suggest you do the same this week, archers. Whenever you have the chance to shatter useless and outdated structure, cock your creative bow and clever arrows...

Sagitarius of the Week: Instant replay

As the flowers come to bloom, may you goats take a greater and deeper pride than most, because of all the extra long hours you put in. To celebrate your success, I wish to see you as often as possible feasting on the fruit of your various trees, reveling in the towering results of your concentrated efforts...

Capricorn of the Week: Westminster Abbey

My sister, a soon to be married girl, wore a penis shaped candy necklace last week during her bachelorette party, a sign of her certain farewell to the phallic population at large in exchange for one in particular. I suggest you perform a similar type of ritual to mark the end of one type of lifestyle, the beginning of another. Create a talisman of your own, edible or non, a symbol of what you leave behind as well as what you look forward to experiencing in the future.

Aquarius of the Week: the final performance by the Beatles

Reminder: Whatever comedy or tragedy befalls you, trust that it's all just a form of assistance in disguise. Whether happy or sad, all news is useful this week. Embedded in the fine print is what knowledge and experience you need to begin actualizing your dreams.

Pisces of the Week: Antonio Sabato Jr.